Footprint

I went to the zoo. We saw wolves, otters, and meercats. I got to see how big a hippo's adult foot print is compared to my hand. It was cold and cloudy outside, but my heart was so warm from the sweet company and companionship.

Enter through the wooden doors
Stained from wet weather
Host to beautiful greens and browns

I watch as the beautiful ones enter inside. They spend their times with wings and sounds, and I watch their wonder. I took the time to sneak away, watching little feet wander over cobblestone, hearing the wilderness and the trees, feeling the frozen air sneak under my layers.

But then I placed my hand in yours
Pressed my palm and felt your callouses
I thought, how big could this be?
Opened my mind and my heart

But You Were There

Wooden planks to balance upon
Walking with you, and talking
Standing side by side, but separate
That's how we want and need it
And I am grateful, you know that

Desires and wishes discussed
Honesty poured from a tall bottle
Laughing those natural laughs
I know you missed seeing them
And I am sorry, you know that

Time to reflect here on my own
You were off in the distance
Too far to see, but you were there
I was confident of your presence
And I am here, please know that

Encounter

(Image via WeHeartIt)

Today's cool wind blows through the windows and follows a trail down the hallway, into my sunlit room. As the blinds, white and waving, touch each other while they rustle in the wind, it makes the sound of footsteps coming my way. I close my eyes and imagine.. You tiptoe up the stairs to my apartment.. Open the door ever so quietly.. And as I write this, you're making your way down the hall, with cherry blossoms.. And you're standing behind me, pouring love down on me, and kiss me on my cheek. You are my brother, my love. And I'm home.

Question of the blog:

Who are you missing?

South Lake

taken

down.

Tahoe.

Friends, late nights, dr. pepper, card games, sledding, fireplace, street-wide celebration, snow.

Happy new years.

Transfiguration

Open.

Everything is white, and forest green, and a silver blue-gray.

I'm driving, it's warm inside and my heart is full and I can see that today is the day after a storm, with everything fresh and serene. We are muted, like I pressed a button on the remote, but I'm smiling and laughing, watching myself from the back seat. Mountain air and the feeling of a new day.

As we make ourselves up a hill, I see a semi coming down towards us, its body buckling. The front and rear are horizontal to the road, coming towards us and I know there is nothing we can do but look upwards. And I turn to you, and I look at your eyes which match the trees behind you, and you are afraid.

The sun is shining through the trees and the view pans out, to a beautiful landscape, separated by a thin line of humanity.

I say to you,

"Things are going to be okay."
I show you I love you, and reassure you. "Be calm, and rest." I am smiling, and I see pure joy flowing out of me and surrounding you. The air is still, and I look around all around us, to see things changing. The snow on the ground and in the trees, taking shape into the feathers of the most beautiful bird. Radiant wings of all that surrounded us, down to our own bodies.

This was the transfiguration of our lives.

Keep It

Keep life meaningful

Ocean tomorrow.

Splashing in the waves, clouds overhead, but that's okay, because I like it and that's what makes me feel like I'm at home.

Question of the blog:

I like the feeling of really cold ocean water. When it hits my skin, I get this rush of emotion that bursts out of my body in laughter. I laugh uncontrollably as I shiver in the water.

What is something that makes you genuinely laugh?

May Angels Lead You In

Clouds rest closely to the ground

Driving through without a sound

Heater on and headlights guide

And Lord you know how hard I've tried

Gates lead me home once again

The steady rhythm of that train

Doors wide open greet me in

Wipe off the moisture from my skin

Strum the chords you love to hear

I whisper quietly in your ear

Wipe away the tears you cry

I'll sing you now a lullaby

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

But if I die before I wake

I pray for God my soul to take

Both Sides Now

It's raining. The sun in shining and the rain is pouring down.

My blinds are open, and I watch the rain like it's the last thing I'll do on this earth. It's the last thing I expected to see. A thirst the ground yearns so much for, is finally quenched. As I look outside at this beauty, I look at the other flats around my school. Every blind is closed, I am alone. I am alone to experience this moment, and wouldn't have it any other way. Stripes of water down my windows, and now it's gone.

We Don't Need An S.O.S.

Let the light in, and the grass
Water flows without the dam
So break it down, and make us clean

The summer heat is back again
Blowing through my hair
Tangles down to the water

Distance makes me feel farther
As I hang up I feel less whole
So sail me through the winding road

I know I'm one among the fence
I read through you, Viva, alive
My arms are stretched, opened wide

Send me out saying
Smash my fists against the wall
I'm breaking down this fence

The water's cold down to your bone.

Down By The River

And all those lonely nights down by the river
Brought me bread and water, water in
But though i tried so hard my little darling
I couldn't keep the night from comin' in






Home. Down winding roads to the water's edge. Joanna Newsom and the Yuba River. I love you. Granite that curves around to cuddle you close. Warm sun, cold stream. Drops of water on your favorite book, as you dry off. Happy to be here, today.

Question of the blog:
When do you feel home?

Nineteen Shores

We hit May
this day marks
your baby's birth
and meadowlarks

No time to rest these tired eyes
as I travel to the ocean's shore
I've walked this world for nineteen years
Not once have been lead here before

In nineteen years I've seen three lands
East went West and West went South
I set my eyes on what I'd want
Listening to what came from your mouth

But it's my birthday tomorrow
and as I bite my tongue
I've remembered yesterday
I was nineteen years young

Those words that come just once a year
They roll right off your lips
Happy birthday to you, doll
has come and gone like sailing ships

Looking down the rusted boat
water splashing up the side
You and I are ever changing
Just like the ocean's tide.

We hit May
this day marks
your baby's birth
and meadowlarks

But it's my birthday tomorrow
and as I bite my tongue
I've remembered yesterday
I was nineteen years young

Cupboards Full

(WeHeartIt)

Here's the thing about rainy days.
1. I think going to school should be illegal. Who likes to go to school in the rain?
2. There should always be a complimentary boyfriend/girlfriend to cuddle with.
3. Cupboards should be prepared with Minestrone and Baguettes.
4. Rainy days have the exact same playlist, every rainy day. Be prepared.
5. All human beings should have the day off from dressing nice. Pajamas in public- accepted.

Question of the blog:
What's on your rainy day playlist?

Mustard and Catch Up

Hi... Umm. Do you hate me? I'm sorry I've been away so long. I feel like I have abandoned a child or something. I promise I'll do better!
A lot has happened in the past week, so here is a quick recap.
1. I saw How To Train Your Dragon in 3D last night, and it was so amazing. I would definitely call it one of the best children's movies of our time. Also- It could have been called "Cats With Wings" because those dragons are basically felines. Which I'm obsessed with.
2. I got a job with the census, so I'm for realsies going to England. Which is awesome and scary all rolled into one. Work has been weird lately, and I do not like throwing up sushi. SICK.
3. This past week, my family was gone on spring break. In this time I came to the conclusion that Hamilton, our 25 toed cat, is nutso and I can't handle him. I just about punted him because he is so annoying.
4. The weather has been so fickle lately, and it makes me sad that I can't just drive down to the river whenever I want. I hope it is sunny tomorrow, so I can listen to my playlist of river. Dustin, Jordan and I listened to some of the best songs from last summer. Can't wait for river days.

All Four

Spring is here. I finally see it! I am so glad I live in a place with four seasons. I always want to live in a place that holds all of them.

(All images from WeHeartIt)

I love the changes of the seasons. It's so beautiful to see how the earth weaves in this pattern, from hot to cold, dark and light. The thing I enjoy most about spring is the smells. Trees that carry a smell of pretty little blossoms. Flowers that fill a room with joy and fragrance.


I like summer for its power. The sun beats down and I drive to the river to bask in its heat. I like the jolt of cold when you first jump in the Yuba. The sunsets make me feel full at the end of the day, like today was an accomplishment in itself.


I like autumn for its colors. Autumn is sort of a lonesome stage of the seasons. The colors turn so incredibly vibrant as the days grow colder. I love seeing little animals collecting their food for the winter, especially squirrels with cheeks full of nuts. I like the dry feeling of Autumn.


I like that winter forces you in or out. I love the preparation that goes in to staying warm, and the surprise of new snow on the ground when you wake up. Winter is gentle, but cold.I like traveling up in elevation and seeing how the snow has laid itself on the mountains.

Question of the blog:
I like Autumn the most. What is your favorite season? Do you live in a place with all four seasons?

Rain, Wedding, Life and Times

To be completely honest, this rainy weather doesn't suite me right now. I'm not a rainy weather type of person. My being is changing constantly... From views to life experiences to what I choose to do. I guess it's that part of me that doesn't want the rain.

I'm sucking on these little lemon drops I got as a party gift from Brittany and Jonny's wedding. In hopes to distract myself from the rain, I'll post some photos from their beautiful night on Sunday. Enjoy.

The wedding was held at Penn Valley Community Church

First dance as husband and wife

Table arrangements, which I'm munching on as I type.

Kissing! Ooh la la!

Reception

At the end of the night, after all the dancing!

Jacob, Jillian, and I after the wedding.

Jillian, Jacob, Dustin, and Sam.

It was a lovely occasion and I am so blessed to know Brittany and Jonny.

As for today, I am going to study, and read, and go to class and it's going to be great. I'm going to make the best out of the rest of this Tuesday.

Question of the blog:
Do you ever see yourself getting married? To be honest it always freaks me out a little when people say I'll be married soon. What's soon?! When can you picture yourself getting married?

Cabin Fever After One Day

Hi.
It's cold.
21 degrees outside right now.
My dad says that when it's late and I get tired, I get "weepy"
and tonight is one of those nights.
So as I hop into bed, here are some photos from today.
Philip, and whoever else who is reading this that might be missing home,
I send you my love and warm fuzzy feelings to cheer you up until you see the snowy hills of Nevada County again. Let's cross our fingers for another white Christmas, shall we?

Local on the Z's

Bad idea of the day: Going on a run on a smoky day like this.

My iTunes: so bad at shuffling songs today. It keeps going in order!

Decided: In two or three paychecks, I am going to buy a Nikon d40.

The day ahead: Making a summer sandwich, taking a legitimately long and thorough shower, coffee with Andy, and work.

I promised myself I would stay active and busy once I left camp. I have succeeded so far!

Question of the blog:
Now that summer is coming to an end, I am reviewing and looking back at my favorite memories to blog about. What was one of your favorite memories from the summer?

Autumn Autumn Autumn...

After spelling that three times, autumn looks SO WEIRD.
One of my favorite things in the whole wide world is this:
Cold days. windy days where your hair is blowing everywhere and it just won't stay put. It's sunny, but you're cold. Your legs have that twinge of chill as you're walking back to your car. The class you just left wasn't that interesting, and you think, what the heck am I going to do after this? You are irritable, but deep down inside, you know that something so simple could make your day perfect. You unlock the door, and sit in your car.
And there it is.
Stillness, heat. You squish down into your comfy seat and just sit there, enjoying the stillness of the air and the sun pouring down into you through your car. I love it. That is one of the things I am most excited for in autumn. Cold windy sunny days, and warm still peaceful cars.

Question of the blog:
What is one of your favorite things about Autumn?

Glimpse Of Heaven

Tonight I saw the prettiest meteor I have ever seen in my life.

Lying on a tan lawn chair
My head resting on a shoulder I enjoy so much
A warm black blanket to keep the wind away
Looking up at the stars,
and I feel like I could look into eternity.
The stars shine and they move,
Like God is continually winking at me.
A father saying, "Good job."
"I love you."
"You are beautiful."
And it is beautiful.
As one small meteor was thrown across,
another passed.
They were here as fast as they were gone,
dainty and fragile like a child you just met.

What I love about meteor showers, is the unexpectancy.
You look and you search, but it is not you that's doing the work.
God will bring you the gift when He brings it to you.
I turned my head upwards,
and there it was. The most stunning piece of artwork I have ever seen.
The meteor was strewn across the sky so far and with such elegance, it left a trail behind it that took my breath away. I didn't expect to see such a beautiful sight tonight, and not at that moment.

God has placed some incredible moments in my life that were not expected. Some moments felt tragic, others felt like complete miracles. I'm not talking about moments in nature, but the experiences I have with other people, and the things I have gone through in life. As I thought, "Where have you been?" tonight, I know that God has spent a lot of time preparing me to be the person I am today, and that he put previous experiences in my life so that I could be this person.
I am learning how beautiful life is when you just open your eyes, with your face turned towards God. That is when you catch glimpses of heaven.

Back and Forth

Most of you don't know this, but in January I started getting extreme back pain and soreness for no reason. I was in physical therapy and seeing a Chiropractor for about 5 months, and it helped a lot. Through those 5 months I changed my diet a lot, and worked a lot on strengthening my back. A lot of it was due to stress, which I (thought I) learned how to control a little bit, or enough to not let it affect my body, especially my back. I was going strong all through the end of may up until a few days ago, when my back started feeling very sore. I'm worried about how long this pain is going to stay, and I'm worried that I will have to start doing physical therapy again. I don't want my back pain to affect how I counsel my last three weeks at camp... So please keep me in prayer. I think this is my body telling me I need to cool it this week and stop getting worked up. Sigh.

On a lighter note, today is beautiful. Go outside and do something! Today is the perfect river day.

(These are from last Saturday at the river. I'll post more pictures of that day very soon.)