Saturday, October 31, 2009

Costume Part 1 of 2

My precious little belly button sister. Greek goddess today for school.

Gold paint, old shoes, new look and perfect fit.

Little shmitzels looked so precious darling. This was at 6:30 am. What a champ.

Ah, the world of sequins and bed sheets. Tonight is round two of this outfit.. I'll wear the exact same thing for work tonight. Two for one deal!

Thursday, October 29, 2009


A Poem
Viruses, oh viruses, why must you infect me?
All I want to do is watch shows like Community.
My computer hates you, you can't win,
Just wait five hours, till Greg comes in
And kills you all, you little viruses,

Which leads me to this: Greg and Sandro come home this weekend! I am so excited. For those of you who don't know, my house has essentially become a hostel for all those in Nevada County, and both of these guys have been staying at my house off and on for years. My brothas. Can't wait to get the family together again.
...It's getting my biological family together which is the difficult part!

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Foam Soap, Among Other Things...

Over the weekend, I went with two of my friends to Barnes and Noble, as well as a few other fun places. Getting out of town is always refreshing. I always forget how much I enjoy big, multi-story bookstores like that. I could get lost in there for hours. This being said, I have a few points to make, that I should have made months and months ago.
1. Every Barnes and Noble I go to has foam soap in the bathrooms. I love it. I don't know what it is about foam soap, but it makes my hands feel extra clean. That is just my imagination, I'm sure, but there's something about foam soap that I enjoy so much.
2. Out of all the places I would hate to be dumped, a bookstore like Barnes and Noble would probably be on the top ten. I haven't made a list of the worst places to be dumped, but I know that would be on it.
3. I think it would be fun to be an artist for book covers. Well, I'm not much of a drawing champ but at least take cool blurry photos to give a bit of mysticism to the books.
4. I do judge a book by its cover. But that has no correlation of how I treat human beings. We're talking about books here.
5. I have way too many books on my list right now. But I will read them all one day.

I have been told that Into the Wild was better as a book than a movie.

Jillian gets on my case about having not finished The Alchemist yet..

Saw the movie for White Oleander. Why not try the book?

All reviews point to yes on Tuesdays with Morrie. Well, 99% of the reviews from my friends. But I always enjoy life lessons. I almost bought this one at Barnes and Noble this time around, but I ran before I took out my wallet.

I remember Annie telling me good things about this one. And then I saw a free copy at the library so I took it. It's been sitting on my shelf for too long, and it must be read.

I already have this one too, and have heard great things about it. Funny books about the Antichrist getting lost in the hospital as a baby? I'm in.

Now if only I had time!

Question of the blog:
Any advice on these few books I have up? What is on your top 5 list that you would recommend?

Tuesday, October 27, 2009


I sound like a man today. Scratchy throat and a stuffed up nose! I have two tests tonight, YIKES. Wish me luck! I killed a spider today, I am sort of disgusted with myself. Today I will wash my hair, but I will not spend any time dressing cute. Get over it. Time for some tea and a switch to Psychology studying... I'm getting good blog ideas for later days, I promise! Expect a few on Friday.

Monday, October 26, 2009

In The Room Where You Sleep

Moorea posted this song a few days ago... I love it. And it doesn't hurt that the love of my life is singing. Oh Ryan Gosling.... You make me swoon.
And Halloween costumes just in time for the lovely holiday!

Question of the blog:
This year, I'm working on Halloween. I felt as though it wasn't as important to dress up and trick or treat this year, as it is that I save money. I think my coworkers and I are dressing up as Grecian Goddesses, which should be fun! Togas, braids, gold, cheap easy fun. What has been your favorite costume you've ever dressed up in?

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Take A Seat, Stay A While

Exhausted from this weekend already? Me too!

I easily made $200 this weekend working. WOO! I just sacrificed my health and legs, that's all. So exhausted. I'll have some legitimate posts up soon.

Have a great weekend!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Do The Math

2 cups of tea
3 slices of cinnamon raisin bread
1 episode of Community
1 episode of The Office
3 episodes of Glee
perfect pregame ritual to hell weekend 2009
Work tonight. Tomorrow morning. Tomorrow night.
Let the games begin!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Expect Respect: The Politics Of It All

When I was younger, I didn't have much respect for myself. I had always been taught to respect those around me, but I overlooked the importance of loving myself, and therefore was taken advantage of for my talents and skills. Since then, I have learned how important it is for that self-respect to be present in my life, and I know how to properly respect and love others because of it. I know that I should demand respect, because I, like everyone in this world, deserve it. I strive to respect others.
This leads me to the topic of my talents and skills, and how I feel as though people have started to think they can take advantage of them. I am not bragging when I say this, I just know that I have a nice camera. I know that I can take good photographs from time to time. But it's when people start using these resources for only their benefit that I feel a little discouraged in the photography field, in life in general I suppose.
I love portraiture. My goal is to capture the person how they really are, like when you look at a photograph of someone and feel as though you have known them for years. There are a few people I just love to photograph, and there are others who ask for my photographic assistance in projects, and others who ask for me to take their photoraphs in exchange for other things, photographs of my own, or money, or whatever. I appreciate their willingness to show that they appreciate what I do for them. With those things I know that they appreciate what I am doing. Even people saying yes to my offer to take their photographs is a huge compliment to me. If anyone asks kindly, and I know that they appreciate the hard work I put into my art, I am more than happy to include them in it.
Since getting my new camera, I've received quite a few requests from people for me to photograph them. I'm planning on shooting for a band soon, and others want to exchange photographs of them with taking photographs of me. It's motivating to know that people like my photography! If you're one of those people, thank you. Thank you so much. I really can't tell you how flattered I am, and how excited I get when I find out people enjoy what I do.
When people I hardly know, though, simply state that they want to hang out so I can take their picture, I'm a little discouraged. Offended, really. I think that's a little too blunt for the manners that I have been taugh to abide by since childhood. If you want to hang out with me just because of my resources, I can charge you for that. That's called modeling, and there's generally a fee with that. But I'm not going to waste my time if you don't want to actually have a friendship with me.
How can I properly capture a picture of someone that I don't know, and who has intentions of using me at no cost to themselves? I want to be passionate about the things I do, the people I photograph. I want to photograph you, but I want respect to come before that.
I expect respect from you, because I want to respect you too. One for one. Let's work together here.

Smile! You Are Poor.

Point one: Retainers and garbage disposals do not mix.
Point two: I do not have $150 to spend.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

If You Could See Me Now...

Dear Andy,
Remember how we said we would get fit? Yeah, I'm slackin'...
Love Always,

You Make My Heart Sing

While I was visiting Andy, we went and saw the movie I have been anticipating to see for MONTHS. And I give the new Where the Wild Things Are movie an A for awesome. I loved it. Simply incredible.
At Bible Study Fellowship today, I was asked to work in the nursery with all the little babies (Well, 2-6 year olds I think), and it rocked my world. I freaking love babies. I had a select few favorites from the day:
Sarah: Spunky little baby girl with beautiful skin and big curly afro hair. She thought my Toms were funny and we sand the ABCs together on repeat for about 5 minutes. "I love my daddy. He always makes me laugh." Make me melt!
Wyatt: Space cadet like I've never seen. This little boy was more A.D.D. than any kid I had met at camp this summer. "Glue your bottoms to your chair.. Now put on your seat belt! Put on your thinking cap, and your listening ears! Open up your eyes!" Wyatt just sat there like a dumbfounded potato. He was so precious cutesie.
There were a few others, like Corbin who would just fall on the floor laughing for no reason whatsoever. Joleen who made dolphins and houses with me with sparkly play-doh. Lindsey who would look up at me with those puppy dog eyes and reach up her hands like my hug was the only thing that mattered in this world.
Ah, precious bootsies. I want one. Just kidding. All in good time. I've got a lot of things to do before I have a little babe of my own.
I played with the sparkly Play-Doh with Lucca, Elizabeth, and Marina Grace. I read Where The Wild Things Are to Corbin and Brando until they were picked up by their mommas. I love babies.

Question of the blog:
Lately I've been all about Pandora radio. There's a part of me that likes it so much simply because when I see Pandora I think, Panda! Mozilla Firefox always reminds me of when Jillian called it Mozzarella Firefox for years before realizing it wasn't spelled like the cheese. Is there any word that you just cannot pronounce or are reminded of something completely different from what the word really is?

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


A bit cheesy, but what doesn't make me cry.

Leave Me from Daros Films on Vimeo.

Leave me.

Because Everything Works In Your Arms

Last Wednesday, I flew down to visit my boyfriend in San Diego. The next morning, of course, I woke up with a 102 fever. It was a blessing in disguise, though, and gave us an entire day to lay low and spend quality time with each other.

Con Pane . Cat naps . Back rubs . Sunset Cliffs

I felt almost completely better by Friday morning. We took a trip to Balboa Park where we visited a few museums. We saw everything from beautiful Russian icons to Picasso and Miro. It was a beautiful sunny day, perfect for a day at the park. We are such old people.
Later that night, Andy took me to the Gas Lamp to Nobu Sushi. Holy moley, it was delicious. We got all dressed up and had a wonderful time.

Pretty sights . Bluefin tuna . Staircases . Night talks on a ledge

Saturday was a foggy day. We spent some time at the beach, walking along the rocks and talking on a blanket. Later that night we babysat Stephen and Jillian who live in Old Town. After babysitting, Andy proceeded to spend way too much money on us to see a movie and enjoy a few handfuls of popcorn.

Footprints in the sand . Car wash . Clone Wars . Wild Things

We spent Sunday morning at the church Andy is interning at. I met his crazy boys he spends every Wednesday with. Afterwards, we went to the mall with a few of the youth kids and grabbed some lunch. "It means handsome one!" -Jake
Sunday night was "man night" for Andy and I. Miguel's dinner, cigars, night walks and the prettiest view.

Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop . Cheese dip . Holding pinkies

Six-thirty wake up calls.
I came home yesterday (Monday), but before I left, we packed my things up, and headed to the Living Room for some coffee. Andy and I spent some time on a bench looking at the bay before I flew back home.

Fit like puzzle pieces . Goodbyes . Sudoku . Green tea and Sugar in the raw

Bye bye boyfriend. See you in thirty-three!

Welcome Aboard

Pretty girl at the airport,
fast goodbyes and Sudoku.
Where did you come from?
We're cuter than them.
I fly by my sister with sleepy eyes.

Flying Southwest is my favorite. And if you haven't seen this, you must watch it!

Also, I thought I would post this as a reminder. Our flight was delayed 15 minutes because of a crew change, and a few people were thoroughly pissed off. So here's a good little reminder of how blessed we really are.

I am one of those people that can rarely sleep in planes because I am so excited. I'm in the air! The feeling of taking off has to be one of the most incredible feelings for me. A rush just goes over my body and I can't help but smile.

Question of the blog:
Do you like flying? Which is your favorite airline and why?

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Waves Of Mercy

Sometimes I get these weird waves of anxiety and chaos that I just need to lay down where I am and cry. It reminds me of when I lived in England for some reason. I can't remember a time when I ever did that as a small child, but something is just comforting to me when I lie down just where I was standing and curl up like a kitty and hide for a minute. It happens. I am up and down. I pray that one day, somebody will love me through my ups and downs. I pray for them every day.

Never Again

Raise your hand if you've ever been to Alta Sierra. Raise your hand if you have ever been lost in Alta Sierra. Yeah that's me every time.

I was seriously lost in the place for an hour today.
Patricia, Scott, Alexandra, Pammy, all of the street names are the same.
Kill me now.
I will never live in a place like Alta Sierra.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Take Flight

A.D.D. sometimes has its ups.

My older sister wrote a song one night over winter break last year, I think, and it was around the same time I first learned to make paper cranes. Today I made cloth cranes. I love them. It's like they have little personalities now that they have stitching and weaving.

Listen to my sister's music here.


Question of the blog:
Finger painting, scrapbooking, making blueprints of houses, do you have any art projects you like to do? I enjoy origami and making collages from magazines and photos! I'd love to hear about what you like to do.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Pomegranate Cider

Breakfast with anits,
nap.. nap.. nap..
Printed photos, frames, latte.
Best dinner, with birthday pie.

Too much dinner, with birthday pie.
Drive up down around,
reminds me of yesterday.
Scary bridges and water sources,
Mekka is sneaky and closes 15 minutes early.

searching for Rubber Lake,
and duh,
We were right.
Bounce and glide but stuck like sand
Running slow motion.
Acid is building, and building,
my stomach starts to turn
and twist.

We hide in the shadows.

Climb the razor fence and we are safe.
Blue lights that stare you down,
Like a child who knows he's been bad.
Drive home
music off
Chamomile tea and rice cakes,

Good night moon.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Singin' Oh Way Oh

I had a dream while I had my mega nap today. It sorta went like this.
It was a counselor again... It was just like summer, with all the counselors and Monty and Shims as my directors. I was wearing my blue shirt and we all piled onto the Magic Carpet to go to Buck Horn when I realized, crap, I didn't count my kids before we got on. They're not sitting together and it's the first day of the week! Just like I did over summer, I pulled out my loud voice and yelled, as always, STARDUST'S CAAABIN, RAISE YOUR HANDS. As I looked around, I saw 3 girls raise their hand. That wasn't right.. STARDUST'S CAAABIN, RAISE YOUR HANDS. HIGH. Three hands.. Seven.. twelve?! Thirteen little girls hands raised. I turned to Monty who was secretly holding my hand as we sat on the Magic Carpet and he said, "Yeah, it's because we gave you a break last week." I couldn't remember any break. "And we gave you a break the week before." They purposely put thirteen girls in my cabin! The most I ever had all summer was eight and a day camper! I was in for a rough week. I took a deep breath and started praying for my girls...
And I woke up. I miss camp. I hope I still have my loud singing voice down in there...
There was a great big moose, he liked to drink a lot of juice.

Thursday, October 8, 2009


0. Miles comes home today. Yess.
1. I have one last mid-term, I am so nervous.
2. Today, well, I guess yesterday, was Andy's and my 2 month. Yee.
3. I bought a new pillow for 3 dollars today. Pillows and toothbrushes can always make me happy.
4. Must get through Blue Like Jazz. I have 4 books on my list that I really want to read!!
5. I am poor. I think I have 5 dollars in cash in my wallet right now.
6. I hope you have seen this. It is so awesome but the music is so sad that I feel like the end is just going to be a photo of him jumping off a cliff or something. It's so depressing.
7. I will be seeing my man in 7 days. I cannot wait.
8. l8er. Remember sk8er boi?
Oh goodness.
Why am I awake at 3 am ;[

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Frizzled Hair And All.

Eugh, I have the insomnia that leaves you like a zombie in the day.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Beat Me To The Punch

We have magnetic poetry at my house. It makes me happier than I thought it would make me.

Pandemonium, Luggage, Etc.

I signed up for Pandora today, and so far so good. Thank you Andy for the recommendation, and Jillian I am eagerly waiting for this David Gray cd! I googled Pandora today, and let me tell you there are a lot of things in this world called Pandora. I also caught up on my Greek mythology today, so I can check that one off my list. ?
Have you ever wondered how awful it must be to work in the lost luggage department at the airport? When I was at the airport picking up my parents this weekend, there came a thought in my brain that just wondered how bad off their job probably is.
"Hi, how can we help you today?"
"Well, I lost my luggage in flight 174"
"Okay. What color was it?"
"It was dark green. Probably medium sized. It had clothes in it. And some shampoo."
I can't imagine how monotonous that must be, because come on, luggage all looks the same! Why is it that every luggage bag is a darker shade of green? I've always wondered why the standard color isn't like, brown, or blue. They're all dark green... You do get the occasional red one, that adds a bit of flare and Christmas tide to it all.
This was a very scattered blog. My mind is all over the place tonight!

Anti-Social Alexandra

I think the reason why I was so excited about night classes was that I would not be seeing most of the people I probably already knew. For some reason, I am very very introverted at school, and I have made absolutely no effort to become social in my classes. I am going to change that tonight. I will be better at this. Where did my extroversion run to?!

Cozy Not Claustrophobic.

When my baby sister was really little, she would cuddle up to my dad on the couch every time she saw him sitting there. After a while we called it "schmooshing" because she would attach herself to him like a leech and hold on so tight, he would lose his breath. "Bella you need to stop schmooshing me," he would say.
I remember when Moorea and I would fight as little kids, and my parents would make us, "kiss and make up!" That drawn out hug was killer for us both. I sort of enjoyed the comfort of her being there, but I remember she just loathed it. It was tight quarters for people who didn't want to be close to each other.
As I finished up reading last night (by the way, I'm reading Blue Like Jazz, and contrary to what I have heard before, I really don't like it that much..), I snuggled up into my bed and tried to get warm. My dad turns off the heat at night, so I am forced to cuddle with pillows and stay in the same position to maintain any heat at all throughout the night. As I schmooshed the covers around me, I realized that I am the type of person that longs for affection, or mere cozyness, but I get claustrophobic very easily. I guess I could relate that to anything in my life.. I enjoy friends that want to be connected, but I get claustrophobic and anxious very easily. Continual nagging or expectations from me end up driving me away, but given room and space sometimes, I find it much more comfortable to grow. I look at the friends I have had the blessing of being close to for quite a while, and I think they all understand that about me, whether it's in the front of their mind or subconsciously. They know that I like to be cozy, but not claustrophobic.

Question of the blog:
I found this precious little band on YouTube today, and this rocked my world.

ALSO, this version of My Favorite Things made me smile so big. If you follow my blog, you probably remember my past lists of my favorite things.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Goodbye, thank you for everything.
Greet us at the gates.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Rawr! To You, Too!

Mmmm best Facebook application ever! Hope you all had a wild weekend!
PS Andy and I are going to see this when I visit him.. I cannot wait!


Miracle of the day: Came home to burning muffins. I am so glad the house didn't burn down before I had to pick up my parents from their "vacation". I couldn't hear them calling from church (or smell for that matter), but the house definitely reeks of muffins on fire now. PS not my fault. The culprit will go unnamed.

Question of the blog:
Have you ever almost burned down your own house on accident? That sentence does not sound correct.

Side Note.


You Make Me Want To Dance!

Tonight was Nevada Union's homecoming dance. Weird.. It's already been two years since I last attended one. My little sister went to her first high school dance. Weird weird. She is so grown up. This was her cute punky hip outfit that I adore. Hair and shoes from me, she bought the dress herself and added a touch of rebel with the little bandana. She is just too precious.

I am proud of my little shister. She is turning into a great little lady. I love her.
Speaking of sisters, I miss big shister Moorea. I want my trinity of sisters to be together again. Moo Moo, you are not alone in that. I miss you a million times over, and cannot wait to see you again.

Question of the blog:
I am all about Bjork right now, which is weird for me because I have never really liked her. Probably because of the Bjork cult following popularity and songs that are just too confusing for me to understand or appreciate. But I am coming out of the Bjork closet and I am saying I enjoy her music. I have been listening to this and smiling as I watch. I like this song because it is very childlike and comforting in that way. The tune just reminds me of little kid memories. I love it.

I wouldn't consider it a guilty pleasure for me to listen to her music, but I do have a few bands that I am just so embarrassed about, but I absolutely love them. What are your guilty pleasure bands?

Friday, October 2, 2009

Pom Pom Baby

I bought a pomegranate today!

And let me tell you, it was dericious.

Question of the blog:
One thing I cannot stand though, is this obsession with pomegranate smell right now. Shampoo, soap, it is so sickly sweet smelling, and honestly smells nothing like real pomegranates. It's gross! What is one smell you absolutely hate?

Give Her Butterflies

I like hike days. This sign reminded me of how excited I am to see Where the Wild Things are. I saw it and instantly thought of the wild things and their scraggly fur. haha

Carvings in the bridge. I went on a little hike at Bridgeport. Just a few miles of silence and peace. It gave me a lot of time for reflection and just focusing on the beauty of my surroundings. There were a few people gold panning in the river, and it was so cute. I haven't seen people gold pan in a while. Oh Nevada County.

Pretty moss. Macro is my life.

It is Autumn. I love it. The leaves are starting to turn pretty colors, and trees cut down are drying out and blending in with its surrounding. Autumn is so warm.

Bridgeport insides. No guts, I promise. Just pretty windows shining in glimpses of light. It is quiet and cool inside. Peaceful moments in chaotic times.

Good day. White butterflies crossed my path. Good luck.
More on my FLICKR.

Sandpaper Type Of Love

This made me melt. I LOVE KITTIES.
Last night, I was talking/crying to my dad about life in general, when Addie our little tuxedo cat came up to me. She just stared as I continued expressing what my heart felt like, and ever few seconds would let out a little mew. Like she was crying with me. I feel like cats know when you are in pain, or at least all of the cats we have owned just have that sense. I remember being a child, sick in bed for the day, and my cats would come cuddle me all day long. I remember my kitties just staring at me with longing eyes while I cried, and jumping on my lap just to kneed my belly for me.
Little paws massaging my thighs,
Faint mewing to let me know she feels the same,
Sandpaper tongue on my fingers. You can cry. I will be with you.
I love kitties. Forever and alwaysss.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Hello, Goodbye.

Breathe in, out.
Slowing down, speeding up,
you press the button and roll back.
I love you
has never been so beautiful
than when it came
from a dying man's lips.
Thank you,
I love you.
I will see you in heaven.