It's time I get this out of my system.
I've had a lot of thoughts brewing in my body lately, so many that it's become a physical pain for me. As I scroll through the list of hosts for WWOOFing sites (World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms) I have a lot of bitterness towards some, no, a lot of people that have been doubtful on my decision to participate in it. I feel like the moment I told a few people, they looked down on me like I've "changed". Like I'm not the girl they used to know. I've been feeling that a lot lately. Not even with just this decision, but with everything. My life choices are not the choices "the girl they used to know" would have done. Let me please explain something to you.
I am becoming more of the person I want to become, and no thanks to you. I live with good intentions and my eyes focused on the prize ahead, not of your expectations of me. What I participate in in my life is decided by me, and to be honest, I don't care what you think of me. On the topic of traveling, of working on an organic farm, I would have chosen to do this when you knew me back then, just as I am choosing now.
What is it with some people and the word organic? Does it make you think I will come back with dred locks, smelling like marijuana and worshiping other gods? Does it scare you that much? Wasn't is God himself who made this world and the plants organically? Wasn't it God himself who saw that it was good? It is our jobs as Christians not to destroy the earth, but to keep His creation beautiful. Give me a chance to learn more about that.
I am in no place to judge others. I fall continually and I can't even go a day without craving a freaking latte and I forget to read my bible. That gives you no right to judge me, though. I want to learn new ways to love and serve God and His people. Let me go on with my life.
I am growing up right now. I'm becoming an adult and it's scary. I am so anxious for the adventures that are to come to help me become the God-loving woman that I know He sees for my future. Why can't we all just support each other?
Thank you to my parents, and to my boyfriend, who are continually supporting me. Your faith in me means more than you will ever know.