Friday, March 12, 2010

The Head And The Heart

At some and many points, I hit complete rock bottom. And in a sense, that's where I am right now. I have erased my white board that rests faithfully by my computer, and written down what is going to happen. I need to change, and I am going to.
Tonight, I was dealt another hand of control, or lack thereof. With this hand, I was shown my life in its entirety, and how I really am not where, or who, I want to be. It was one of those moments where I had to sit back and think, "where did I end up like this?" Where did we end up like this? It's the head against the heart, or rather, my faith against my childish ways. It's time to grow up now, Alexandra. Time to grow up to have an innocent, childlike faith. That's when you'll really start growing up.

I'm going to be taking some time away for a while. In terms of blogging, I'm not sure. But this next week is going to be a little different in my life. It is going to be a time of prayer and process, a time to reconnect to some things I've left behind. It's time I go back to the time when things were better. Things will be better, I promise.

Question of the blog:
Are you the type of person who follows their head, or their heart first?


Symone said...

I follow my head. All the time.

Moorea Seal said...

you will be ok and you will always come out strong. i am feeling in a rut too. but we are champions!! we come from a family of extremely emotional but super strong willed people. lets take charge of our lives alexandra, we can do it. we are weak in the heart, but God is our power house.
we have the greatest strength.

make a goal list this week. with lots of different sorts of things. like, "organize my desk" to "cut apart an old shirt i hate just to see it torn to shreds" to "eat something yummy at at the health food store" to "wake up at a set time everyday and pray, even if it just for a minute."

would you like a partner to help you get up at a certain time everyday? we could call each other?

miles b. said...


Head too.. But i learn more from the heart. It leads me astray on occasion but generally leaves me stronger from the experience.

My head is almost always right. & if i was most people i would most likely follow it first. But i'm not most people, and i would rather get knocked around in life and grow from it rather than take the safe path.

Head vs. Heart is a constant struggle for me, too. But regardless of the conflict i am always learning.